Cissy Vallario (![[info]](http://www.insanejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} cissysaidso) wrote,@ 2009-09-22 02:30:00 |
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Wednesday - 1/17/08 Aim:Cissy/Nox
cissysaidso (5:43:29 PM): So, uhm, I guess that we should talk?
gnothiseauton4 is available (5:43:30 PM)
gnothiseauton4 (5:44:41 PM): I would have preferred to speak to you in person, but if you'd rather speak via instant messenger, that's fine.
cissysaidso (5:47:03 PM): I would, actually. I'm still really tired and sick a lot of the time so... it's easier for me to just hang out in my room.
gnothiseauton4 (5:48:42 PM): Have you spoken to Jonah since he and I met?
cissysaidso (5:49:52 PM): Yeah. He emailed me to let me know that he wasn't getting fired. Which is good. I'm glad. It'd kind of suck if he did.
gnothiseauton4 (5:50:20 PM): And he informed you of the conditions?
cissysaidso (5:51:11 PM): No romantic relations. That isn't really a problem considering it was just a one night stand to begin with.
gnothiseauton4 (5:52:12 PM): Good.
gnothiseauton4 (5:52:58 PM): You will maintain a professional relationship suitable for students and teachers, and because of the child, you'll of course have a family relationship.
cissysaidso (5:54:50 PM): So how am I supposed to address it when people ask who the father is? Most everyone already knows that I'm pregnant, but I've not divulged much more than that.
gnothiseauton4 (5:56:19 PM): That's a difficult question.
cissysaidso (5:59:01 PM): I know. That's why I'm asking.
gnothiseauton4 (5:59:09 PM): Can I get back to you on that one?
cissysaidso (6:02:12 PM): Also, and I know this is an entirely different situation, but I do want to mention that there is a member of the staff that is married to a student and has a child with said student. Granted, they were married before she became a student or he became a teacher but... He isn't my teacher. And not that I am saying that we would ever become involved in any way other than just being co-parents, I'd like to suggest that perhaps you rethink your conditions seeing as how it wouldn't be a conflict of interest and there's no risk of favortism in the least.
cissysaidso (6:05:14 PM): We hardly know one another right now, but we're going to have to get to know one another given the current situation, and being the product of an essentially broken home, I can't say that I wouldn't see the obvious benefits if he and I were to find some common ground that drew us more firmly together. And while I'm certain that he will respect whatever limitations you set forth, I still feel that I really have to point that out.
gnothiseauton4 (6:06:17 PM): The situations are different, as all are. We have a general rule in place, and it will stay in place. Some exceptions are made. Calvin came to the school a married man, and his wife wanted to learn. She takes classes like other students, but I hope you understand that this case is nothing like your own.
gnothiseauton4 (6:07:28 PM): As for your feelings and relationship with Jonah, I can't control either. What I can do is terminate his employment and expel you, and I will do both if necessary.
cissysaidso (6:13:17 PM): The fact remains, however, that's what happened has happened. And while I am incredibly grateful that a simple mistake didn't lead to horrifying repercussions for the both of us, I will always want what's best for my baby. I know I've not exactly been idea, not as a student or even as a person really, but, like any other parent, I want a better life for my child than I myself had. I don't want her or him to grow up to be anything like me. Like you said, all situations are different, but if the situation were to eventually differ, I hope you'll at least think about it first, and maybe at least just give me the opportunity to withdraw myself as a student before terminating his employment.
gnothiseauton4 (6:16:13 PM): I don't see any reason to continue this discussion, Cecilia. I have set forth my conditions, and I expect them to be honored. You will not sway me on this matter, especially when I'm being more than lenient already.
cissysaidso (6:19:58 PM): So when do you think you'll have an answer to that other question? I have yet to tell my parents and I'd kind of like to know what I can and can't tell them before then.
gnothiseauton4 is available (6:33:19 PM)
Away
gnothiseauton4 (6:33:45 PM): I'l get back to you tomorrow.
cissysaidso (6:35:07 PM): Okay.
cissysaidso (6:35:25 PM): And Professor Alekos?
gnothiseauton4 (6:37:08 PM): Yes?
cissysaidso (6:38:25 PM): Thank you. I hope you haven't put your own career at risk in any way by being so lenient. If you have, then I'll willingly accept any accountability for my mistake.
gnothiseauton4 (6:39:49 PM): I'm trying to look out for the best interests of everyone involved. I don't want Jonah to lose his job, and I don't want you to leave the school until you've learned all you need to learn. I also care about your child and what the baby to have two parents present and know they both love him/her.
cissysaidso (6:42:55 PM): I know you are. And I don't want you to think that I don't appreciate that because I do. This hasn't been easy. Point in fact, it's been pretty terrifying. And I'm really glad to have one less thing to worry about right now. So again, thank you.
gnothiseauton4 (6:43:31 PM): You're welcome. I appreciate you and Jonah being honest.
cissysaidso (6:47:29 PM): Thanks. Usually I just run away. I'm sure you know that if you've looked at my file.
gnothiseauton4 (6:47:47 PM): I do.
cissysaidso (6:51:46 PM): I guess even if you don't always do the right thing, as long as you do it when it really matters, no matter how hard it is to do te right thing, then you're not an entirely horrible person.
gnothiseauton4 (6:52:47 PM): You are not a horrible person, Cecilia. Everyone makes mistakes, it's what we do after screwing up that counts.
cissysaidso (6:56:36 PM): Well hopefully I've found the one thing that I'm destined to do well. I've had a perfect example of what not to do when it comes to being a good parent, so hopefully that'll be helpful in the long run. And I know that Jonah's a good man even if I don't know much else about him.
gnothiseauton4 is available (7:11:06 PM)
Away
gnothiseauton4 (7:13:12 PM): I wish you both luck.
cissysaidso (7:15:04 PM): Thanks.
cissysaidso (5:43:29 PM): So, uhm, I guess that we should talk?
gnothiseauton4 is available (5:43:30 PM)
gnothiseauton4 (5:44:41 PM): I would have preferred to speak to you in person, but if you'd rather speak via instant messenger, that's fine.
cissysaidso (5:47:03 PM): I would, actually. I'm still really tired and sick a lot of the time so... it's easier for me to just hang out in my room.
gnothiseauton4 (5:48:42 PM): Have you spoken to Jonah since he and I met?
cissysaidso (5:49:52 PM): Yeah. He emailed me to let me know that he wasn't getting fired. Which is good. I'm glad. It'd kind of suck if he did.
gnothiseauton4 (5:50:20 PM): And he informed you of the conditions?
cissysaidso (5:51:11 PM): No romantic relations. That isn't really a problem considering it was just a one night stand to begin with.
gnothiseauton4 (5:52:12 PM): Good.
gnothiseauton4 (5:52:58 PM): You will maintain a professional relationship suitable for students and teachers, and because of the child, you'll of course have a family relationship.
cissysaidso (5:54:50 PM): So how am I supposed to address it when people ask who the father is? Most everyone already knows that I'm pregnant, but I've not divulged much more than that.
gnothiseauton4 (5:56:19 PM): That's a difficult question.
cissysaidso (5:59:01 PM): I know. That's why I'm asking.
gnothiseauton4 (5:59:09 PM): Can I get back to you on that one?
cissysaidso (6:02:12 PM): Also, and I know this is an entirely different situation, but I do want to mention that there is a member of the staff that is married to a student and has a child with said student. Granted, they were married before she became a student or he became a teacher but... He isn't my teacher. And not that I am saying that we would ever become involved in any way other than just being co-parents, I'd like to suggest that perhaps you rethink your conditions seeing as how it wouldn't be a conflict of interest and there's no risk of favortism in the least.
cissysaidso (6:05:14 PM): We hardly know one another right now, but we're going to have to get to know one another given the current situation, and being the product of an essentially broken home, I can't say that I wouldn't see the obvious benefits if he and I were to find some common ground that drew us more firmly together. And while I'm certain that he will respect whatever limitations you set forth, I still feel that I really have to point that out.
gnothiseauton4 (6:06:17 PM): The situations are different, as all are. We have a general rule in place, and it will stay in place. Some exceptions are made. Calvin came to the school a married man, and his wife wanted to learn. She takes classes like other students, but I hope you understand that this case is nothing like your own.
gnothiseauton4 (6:07:28 PM): As for your feelings and relationship with Jonah, I can't control either. What I can do is terminate his employment and expel you, and I will do both if necessary.
cissysaidso (6:13:17 PM): The fact remains, however, that's what happened has happened. And while I am incredibly grateful that a simple mistake didn't lead to horrifying repercussions for the both of us, I will always want what's best for my baby. I know I've not exactly been idea, not as a student or even as a person really, but, like any other parent, I want a better life for my child than I myself had. I don't want her or him to grow up to be anything like me. Like you said, all situations are different, but if the situation were to eventually differ, I hope you'll at least think about it first, and maybe at least just give me the opportunity to withdraw myself as a student before terminating his employment.
gnothiseauton4 (6:16:13 PM): I don't see any reason to continue this discussion, Cecilia. I have set forth my conditions, and I expect them to be honored. You will not sway me on this matter, especially when I'm being more than lenient already.
cissysaidso (6:19:58 PM): So when do you think you'll have an answer to that other question? I have yet to tell my parents and I'd kind of like to know what I can and can't tell them before then.
gnothiseauton4 is available (6:33:19 PM)
Away
gnothiseauton4 (6:33:45 PM): I'l get back to you tomorrow.
cissysaidso (6:35:07 PM): Okay.
cissysaidso (6:35:25 PM): And Professor Alekos?
gnothiseauton4 (6:37:08 PM): Yes?
cissysaidso (6:38:25 PM): Thank you. I hope you haven't put your own career at risk in any way by being so lenient. If you have, then I'll willingly accept any accountability for my mistake.
gnothiseauton4 (6:39:49 PM): I'm trying to look out for the best interests of everyone involved. I don't want Jonah to lose his job, and I don't want you to leave the school until you've learned all you need to learn. I also care about your child and what the baby to have two parents present and know they both love him/her.
cissysaidso (6:42:55 PM): I know you are. And I don't want you to think that I don't appreciate that because I do. This hasn't been easy. Point in fact, it's been pretty terrifying. And I'm really glad to have one less thing to worry about right now. So again, thank you.
gnothiseauton4 (6:43:31 PM): You're welcome. I appreciate you and Jonah being honest.
cissysaidso (6:47:29 PM): Thanks. Usually I just run away. I'm sure you know that if you've looked at my file.
gnothiseauton4 (6:47:47 PM): I do.
cissysaidso (6:51:46 PM): I guess even if you don't always do the right thing, as long as you do it when it really matters, no matter how hard it is to do te right thing, then you're not an entirely horrible person.
gnothiseauton4 (6:52:47 PM): You are not a horrible person, Cecilia. Everyone makes mistakes, it's what we do after screwing up that counts.
cissysaidso (6:56:36 PM): Well hopefully I've found the one thing that I'm destined to do well. I've had a perfect example of what not to do when it comes to being a good parent, so hopefully that'll be helpful in the long run. And I know that Jonah's a good man even if I don't know much else about him.
gnothiseauton4 is available (7:11:06 PM)
Away
gnothiseauton4 (7:13:12 PM): I wish you both luck.
cissysaidso (7:15:04 PM): Thanks.
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